I have just started to tell people, just incase anything happens, it will not be a shock. so far most people are very supportive. almost everyone has a friend that did it or something and all are doing well.
I did get an email today from someone that thinks that a drink mix (reliv) is the solution, totally ignoring that this is totally and 300% under medical evaluations, I literally have three different doctors in three different practices in three different zip codes that have done the exams and blood work and agree that 'for me' this is the best solution.
how else can we explain that in 79 days I have lost 23 lbs without limiting calories, just carbohydrates? obviously I am one of 'those' so by permanently removin the absorbtion part of the intestinal tract, I can spend less time obsessing on weight and more time obsession on aperature and shutter speed.
and I was SOOOO Outgoing 100 lbs ago, I was the one to talk to at a party, I was the welcoming committee, now I NEVER leave the house, I hate to go to parties. and when I go, I have a snack and wait for someone to include me and 'wow, surprize of surprizes' no one talks to me. that will change when my body catches up to my personality again.
thinking about my mortality:
In 1968, for a few minutes I drown in a swimming pool, but the motel manager found me.
was rushed to the hospital in 1974 when I went blasting through the house, flew down the stairs and nailed my head on a low hanging beam, split my head open and had to have 5 stitches
I died again in 1975, I drown in a swimming pool (AGAIN) and some kids found me, I was so far gone, my lungs were 100% full of chlorine water, and my body has -0- color, I didn't know that you turn black under water, all the movies are fake.
nearly passed away in 1990 during the delivery of my third child, the nurse didn't check during the pushing part, left me with my husband and mother, and I was covered with a sheet so they didn't know that I was hemorrhaging.
I was in a pretty serious car-wreck and hit a granite mountain in 1992, and my head literally went through the rear view mirror, and through the windshield, I should have died but had just one scratch.
in 1996 I was driving down a little two lane side road, when a dodge truck came flying out of a gas station and plowed right into the driver side of the car, peeling the driver door back from the hinge like a can of sardines
I was so very in danger of dying in 2003, my husband fell asleep at the wheel and we went over a ravine, through a fence, snapped off several wooden fence posts, past a power-line guide wire and came to rest near an extremely busy freight train track (two trains blasted past before the wreckers (took two to get the car of the pit). I knew I was not going to survive, reached around to say good bye to my older son, strapped into his car-seat, I was not wearing a seatbelt and knew there was no time, and no point, however, we had 5 miracles in 5 seconds that morning. the fence post busted and part of it punched into the side window, narrowly missing Erik's head, but sprinkling shattered glass all around him in his car-seat, and punched right back out again, leaving a hole smaller than a saucer. missing that guide wire by about 10 feet was something, I do not know if the posts, the guide wire or what busted the front bumper and the rear bumpers in half, but the passenger side 1/2's just blew off like Frisbees. I do know that the fence post's sheared off everything on the passenger side of the car, no side mirrors, no door handles, nothing was left. but I will tell you that the ravine was the freakiest part. I saw it coming up, 25ft across, 10ft deep and a car that is only 15ft long, there was absolutely no explanation for what happened, it was as if the hand of god slide under the chassis because the drivers side was never airborne, just the passenger side.
the miracles that I have survived are even more than I can detail but have occurred none the less. I do not know what my purpose is here, why I am 'still here' when all is said and done, I have completed the tasks that I am supposed to in the opportunities that I have been granted. was it to inspire my own children? to inspire my colleagues? to inspire someone? anyone? not that I have not continuously thought about my choices making a difference to someone in the short time I have here period. I have never taken for granted that I would be here, I am really surprised that I have lasted this long. ;)
my husband has asked me to take a few moments and make some notes of my last wishes in case, I swear, does he have any idea how long that would take. all the mass emails, all the mass online posts. ;) I have spent more time getting to know my online friends than I have my IRL friends. course he was probably talking about inconsequential crap like casket or urn, paper or plastic, where to be buried, like that means anything. ;)
but since it is not an issue, I am going to get through this as well, there is no need to fuss about stuff like that. ;)
