Saturday, July 15, 2006

My advice to PreOp Panic:

I got on the scales today. 218!

I have not seen 218 since 1993... I kept telling myself. I just need to TRY harder. I just need to be more CONSISTENT. I just need.... blah blah blah.

I will not tell you that it will be easy. it is not. anyone that thinks this is a cake walk is in for a rude awakening. this is one of the most challenging lifestyle changes ever.


it does work. period. you will survive. you will succeed. you will take back control of your life. now granted, your body will bitchslap you if you go out of your way to self destruct. ;)

my first recommendation is prayer. not only your own prayers, but enlist all of those people around you, far and wide. trust me, they work.

second. even if you started 3 years ago, you will never 'get all your affairs in order' but you can make a start, and then keep resolutions to make some changes. I really felt touched by 'live like you were dying'. I did start treating people better, and resolved to continue after the surgery. I am finishing that 'book' project that I have been puttering on since 1991 (it is a great 'quiet time' project this summer while I heal.

third. journal. blog. but write out your feelings. your thoughts. your fears. keeping them inside just freaks you out and gives the fear a food to feed on and that is not healthy.

fourth. you will change your mind 100x a day, even after the surgery. ;-) this is just NORMAL. I still have days that I think, what the hell was I thinking. but I keep a chart of my progress. my weekly weight and my weekly measurements. I post a graph that shows the slow decent.

each week, I update it and it FEELS SO GOOD. I have a goal, I have a tool. I can be successful.

people will be supportive, it is just human nature, people want the best for you. when you need another pick me up, talk to people, it feels wonderful.

the hardest part for women in general, is to stop swollowing all their own sorrow (along with jelly donuts) and to take time out for themselves and put themselves first. it took me 40 years to finally get to that point. TODAY I COME FIRST. my vitamins are first. my protein is first. my fluids are first. my exersize is first. I am first. not my kids. not my laundry, not my customers. ME! it is not selfish, selfcentered, or self absorbed. it is survival. just like in the airplane. put your own air mask on first before try helping your child or others. this is a tool that is the most selfless act you can do to give your family the best mom/wife/daughter possible for as long as possible.

when it finally comes down to it. LET GO AND LET GOD. just like anything else, he is not done with you yet. granted, this is a factory recall, and your plumbing was not 'perfected', I know I kept thinking, I must be INSANE to go in and deliberately have someone comeplete reroute my plumbing. it defies all logic. but just like someone that needs other surgery from birth defects, this solves a problem that was there from birth, through no fault of our or our parents choice, we were born this way, and now we can resolve the problem.

the first rule is that there are no rules. what I could not eat last month, I may or may not eat this month. this can go either way. it can work FOR your or AGAINST you. how far I walked last month may or may not be how far I can walk this week, also can work for or against you. there are guidelines and they will work for you, each doctor has operated, and then listen to customer feedback and has perfected his method and routine that will work for you if you follow it. listen to your body, when you think you need to move, move, when you think you need to rest, rest. do not measure by what you used to do, throw that out the window. each day is new and different.

you will be okay, you will learn all about YOU. you will take time for YOU! you will succeed! and you will love how good it feels to be YOU!