Friday, January 23, 2009

New Years Resolution hit a little later than expected this year.

loose 15 lbs.

Taking stock of the past and measuring what I would consider a success is in large part atributed to popular magazines coming out with the top 100 what-evers. for me the 100 top women lists that I will never be included on:

100 Sexiest (told my husband that I was going to get a boyfriend, he LAUGHED at me and said GOOD LUCK WITH THAT, 100 Important Women in History, People rarely remember meeting me from last week, Top 100 Women Artists, somehow I was not on that one either, I checked,

100 Women in Hedge Funds - hahaha I cringe when I think about my TINY 403b account with A.G.Edwards.
Top 100 Women Webmasters, could have been, but I could never master ASP, much to my husband's chagrin. Top 100 Women’s Health Blogs, this has me ROTFLMAO, I tried and failed, it also brings me back to the original thought, I have gained 15 lbs in 15 months, that is not a good thing.

Forbes The 100 Most Powerful Women. sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit. yeah, like that will EVER happen, women that wouldn't talk to me in the line at the grocery store. I am such a mess. Lists of 100 Influential Women. okay, there is some hope here. I am pretty influential. I tell my kids to go to school and they usually do. I tell my kids to get ready for cub scouts and they whine a lot. I tell my kids to do their homework.. and they laugh at me. okay, who am I foolin'? not a damn soul.

Top 100 Women of the Bible: Who They Are and ... yeah, my husband swears that I am old enough to be included, but he is a brat. what the hell defines success? and at what point do we say, we have it, had it, or are no longer in the running for it?

I found a list: Be Happy at Work: 100 Women Who Love Their Jobs. that SHOULD have me in it. I do love my job. I love that I can work it when I am feeling up to it, and slide it to the back burner when my kids are pulling at my apron strings. that must have me on it. so is happiness a defining factor for success? because I think that may be my crutch for the fact that while I secretly believe that it is the size of the house, the size of the W-4 and the number of vacations a year that really define success. I qualify for none of the above, we are in a 'starter home' that we could barely afford 12 years ago, and while his income has tripled, the mortgage has remained the same. My income is a fraction of what it was 12 years ago, which is a serious failing on my part, in my eyes (and is reiterated on a daily basis by my spouse). I take off 1/2 the amount of time for vacation and travel, that I used to 12 years ago.
so I do not think that I am better today than I was 12 years ago. and that must mean that I am not succeeding. I know that my time on facebook is really touting to me that some of my classmates have some killer zip codes and mine is boring at best. It has no star power in my opinion.

Back to the lists, 100 hot women chosen by lesbians. nope, didn't make that one either. sad. so very sad. I guess it is time to return back to the regularly scheduled program. what is for dinner?